Four and Twenty Black Birds

"Smokey, my friend, you are entering a world of pain."
- Walter Sobchak, The Big Lebowski.

"Thing is..." he said, lighting the cigarette and giving it to his companion "I don't mind" he continued, wiping the tears and sweat from his companion's face. "I mean what do you do for a living? You're a Businessman? A Tailor? A Waiter? Do you think twice about it? Do you ever wonder about doing something different?" His companion shook his head, his eyes winced, blood gently carressing his ears "No" he smiles and kneels down next to his companion "I didn't think so" he adds, taking the cigarette out of his companion's mouth for a drag then placing it back between the quivering lips "That's why I like you. That's why I feel like I have to explain myself" he stands and walks over to the bed "This is what I do" he turns, smiling "If I am a Tailor then you are my suit" he turns around and drains the takeaway coffee cup on the bedside table. "Who knows? Maybe in another life we could have been friends. Go drinking, picking up girls, double date, see a movie, watch the big... game." He turns back to his companion, something dull, long, matte black and metal in his blue gloved hand. He pauses for a moment, studying his companion, staring "But to be honest, I find the idea of that kind of life quite boring, replusive even. When I see those... people... cattle, I'm convinced I've made the right decision. Guidance councellor be damned. Do you know what I'm saying? No?" He points the object at the head of his companion and pulls the trigger, quickly, quietly. "No" he sighs, throwing the object back on the bed and wrapping his companion in the plastic beneath. "Nobody understands me"

The warm amber halogen lights to the apartment turn on, the large red door closes. "Baby!?" he asks, a quick loving sound of Baby replies as she bounces onto the kitchen counter and purrs to greet him. "Miss me?" he puts the matte black metal suitcase down "Daddy just has to wash his hands" he explains, walking to the bathroom, making sure to wash both sides of each hand four times and scrub his fingernails. After cleaning the mirror and the bathroom just to make sure, vacuuming his lounge room just to make sure, changing his sheets just to be sure, feeding and brushing Baby, he sits, a warm green tea in hand, opposite his computer. He waits for the computer to boot up by going through his Swedish furniture catalogue, circling what he wants, the Bëklus shelf series, the Miningrodä chaise/couch combination provided in a sophisticated brown, tan or black leather. Baby jumps up into his lap and nestles lovingly into him "I love you too" he laughs, stroking the nape of Baby's neck, she purrs. He checks his mail, discarding the advertisements and promotions for soft porn and longer erections with disdain, settling on an important email, opening it. "It looks like Daddy's finally getting a head in this industry" he smiled, tapping the desk in excitement. "Tarquin? That's a funny name."